


It's Just a Scratch, Dean.

by BuckyBarn3s



Series: Angst In A Few Pages [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Death, M/M, One Shot, Other, Self Harm, Self-Harm, Suicidal Dean Winchester, Suicidal Sam Winchester, Suicidal Success, Suicidal Thoughts, one shots, trigger warning for self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:54:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28346469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuckyBarn3s/pseuds/BuckyBarn3s
Series: Angst In A Few Pages [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2075928
Kudos: 5





	It's Just a Scratch, Dean.

Pain, it certainly is an interesting feeling. For whatever reason, pain made Lucifer go away. That scar on Sam's hand, when it was new, made Lucifer disappear if he pressed on it. Now the scar was healed up, so there wasn't really any pain. So Lucifer was hard to ditch.

Sam took to his pocket knife in times of dire need. He started on his upper arm, just little nicks here and there, enough to make Lucifer shift and pout before disappearing again. 

Trouble was... Sam was having to make it hurt worse and worse before Lucifer would disappear. 

He was able to get away with the little nicks Dean would never notice for approximately a week before they stopped working. So he moved on to a little sharper and deeper. He found the outer parts of his thighs were good for the next week and a half, but that wasn't enough. He moved to the more sensitive fronts of the thighs. They weren't that much more sensitive than the outer thighs, but it was enough to work. Only a week this time, did it last. So he moved to the very sensitive inside of his thighs. He cut them very carefully and in just the right spot so that when he walked they wouldn't cause problems. That actually worked for four days before Dean noticed Sam walking a little funny and mentioned it. Sam passed it off as a little residual soreness from there last hunt and not being able to sleep very well. Dean allowed the excuse, even though he knew it was a lie. Sam knew he knew it was a lie, but he had to do it. This was working! After that Sam was able to continue for three weeks on the insides of his thighs, Lucifer was at bay, but Dean constantly watching him, trying to figure out what was up with Sam.

Sam had to start being more careful, if he bled too much and it got somewhere he missed when cleaning that shit up, Dean would know what was going on, and that was something Sam couldn't have. Dean would try to stop him. But it was so hard to be careful when Lucifer would show up and the pressing of old wounds wouldn't help. He had to make new ones to make him stop! 

Dean wouldn't understand that. He'd just try to make Sam stop, and he couldn't. He couldn't stop because it was keeping him sane. Making sure he was able to work and do what he had to. Dean had enough on his plate anyway, waiting on the other shoe to drop and for Sam to go fully comatose since the wall came down. To Dean, Sam seemed (relatively) fine. Fine for them anyway. Sam just knew Dean was waiting for something, anything, to go wrong. 

Besides, they had Castiel cosplaying as God to deal with. He needed Lucifer to fuck off so he could concentrate, right? Right?

That's what he told himself anyway.


End file.
